Onto more things raw, here are the tools that I work with just about everyday.  Email me if you have specific questions as I can tell you where I bought stuff.  Most was through Ebay as I like to shop for the least expensive prices. Check out my pictures:

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Well, if I was to assign a number to my days raw it would be 148 days as of today.

It seems like a long time for me, but it is actually just the beginning. It is weird to think I have not eaten salmon, chicken, red meat, eggs, or even bread in almost 5 months, but then again, is it? I mean millions of people are Vegetarians, Vegans, or Raw Vegans, why not me.

At times I felt like I was living someone else’s life. Like why am I eating this way, but then I thought, why not? It is not so much as me feeling like I am someone else, but rather actually discovering who I always was, and just slowly removing the layers of the world from my eyes so I can re-discover my original me that was always there, just hidden.

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Hello and blessings to all...

About me, well that might be a little tricky...  Well, I guess I better tell you who I am and what this website is all about.  My name is Philip, I am currently 30 years old.  I have been overweight my entire life and have tried it all.  In case you don't believe me, here is the list:

Weight Watchers (3 times)
Weightlifting at gyms (7 memberships at different gyms)
Physical Trainer (2 times)
Atkins (2 times)
Blood Type Diet
Diet Pills (2 times)
Fasting w/ water (2 times)
Vegetarian (2 times)
Vegan (2 times)
Hypnotism for weight loss (2 times)
Guided Imagery
Hospital Nutritionist
Nutrition Counselor (2 times)
Juicing
Martial Arts Classes (2 times)
Exercise videos (countless)

I mean I have either tried or bought every fat caliper, elliptical machine, trampoline, and weight bench set I could find.  I have more weight lifting magazines than you can shake a stick at, and still nothing, until...

RAW LIVING FOODS!!!

I know what you are asking, how did this all start and what is this all about?  Well, it really started with my first International trip, to Germany and Amsterdam actually.

I found out that in Berlin people were constantly staring at me, even tugging on a friends shirt and having them look.  Now Berlin is like a fashion capital, and I am not concerned with the latest trends so I thought that was why I was getting all the attention.  What, plaid shirts aren't in style anymore?

Well, needless to say, after an older lady who worked down stairs from our Amsterdam apartment asked me "How did you get so big" I realized what the staring was all about.  Actually, it came crashing down on me all at once, I didn't see one person over 30 lbs overweight in all my two weeks of travel in Germany or Holland, except of course the occasional American tourist.  They weren't staring at me because of my clothes, they were staring at me because I was 400 lbs.  Now that it is becoming more and more common in the U.S. as obesity is on the rise, but I guess I just had no idea.

Needless to say I felt fairly uncomfortable.  My first response was to get angry, and I decided to stare at everyone that looked at me until they turned away, as I can be intimidating when I want to be.  But then I decided that is not what I really wanted to do, and felt pretty hurt the rest of my trip.
Then, with all the pressure of the stares I received during my trip, getting my suitcases on and off two different trains in time, in a hotel and airport, not knowing the language, it all became overwhelming, and when I got home I had my first and last panic attack/nervous breakdown.

I had never experienced anything like that before in my life.  I was always the calm and cool guy, the guy in control.  I mean I use to do my bills in my head while laying in bed at night.  I had everything under control... or so I thought. 

Now you may be thinking, what does this have to do with raw food, well be patient, this is the build-up.  I mean every great decision you make in your life, and every change in your path of life starts with you realizing were you're at, and what you have become, right?  Well, I was a well planned out organized control madman who had every string pulled so tight it was bound to snap sometime.  When I went to Las Vegas for vacation I had just about every minute of the trip planned out for a full week.  I mean if I took too long brushing my teeth in the morning I was getting panicky because it might throw off my schedule.  That sure is no way to live.  Some of you may be able to relate...

That experience felt like hell for the weeks and months to come, dealing with depression, realizing I was stuck in a revolving door with no exit in sight, and that I never had control of anything, seeing life rush at me all at once and not being able to push pause so I could take it all in.  It was tough, the hardest thing I have ever gone through.  Despite the pain and hard times, something began to birth in me I never knew was there.  Actually it was always there, I just forgot about it.  Something new, something wonderful, something so unexpected...

God worked my hard time into something good, and that was opening my eyes to a world I couldn't see before, or at least didn't want to see.  Eating raw living uncooked organic vegan food (veggies, fruit, nuts, seeds) was just the beginning.  It turned into something so much more, like caring for the planet, becoming Green Conscious, learning to love all over again, releasing control, exercising and liking it, trusting more in God and realizing the importance of prayer, discovering nature like a child, and much, much more.

And, the cherry on the raw cacao cake is that I am loosing weight for the first time in my life, and I couldn't be happier.  Do I miss processed foods, nope!  Do I miss colds and drained energy, nope!  Do I miss being an emotional wreck because I looked through the entire Big & Tall store and could not find one pair of size 58 pants that look good on me, nope!  Do I miss not being able to squeeze behind the wheel in my car because my stomach touched the wheel, nope!  Do I miss having to give up my $150pp 4th row seat tickets to Cirque Du Soleil at the Bellagio in Las Vegas that I was waiting to see because I couldn't fit in the theater seats, nope! 

And I sure as heck don't miss a damn slice of pizza!

I started this raw foods journey on April 1st 2006.  In about 5 months I had lost 75 lbs and was down to 325 lbs, then lost an additional 25lbs over the next 6 months.  I really could have done more but I honestly didn't start to exercise until I lost about 95 lbs.  That's right, I lost 95lbs and didn't exercise a bit, not that that was a good thing.

I plan to use this website to document my weight loss and life transformation with pictures, stories, times of inspiration, times of hardship, whatever comes is what I will share.  Just the truth, nothing more and nothing less.  I will reveal all the tender sores that life has pushed and prodded at in hopes that we can all heal and grow together.

My Goal: To be half the man I used to be
From 400 lbs to 200 lbs. 
The journey begins....

PS.  What do I miss.  I miss chasing butterflies in the backyard when I was a kid.  But don't worry, that is yet to come.

Click here for my before and after pics

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